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Posts Tagged ‘photoblog’

  1. Two Wheeler

    January 13, 2012 by Amy Hansford

    For anyone that didn’t believe me when I said there were Segway-mounted security guards in Milton Keynes shopping centre…

    Admittedly, it seems to be their First Aid unit rather than general security, but can you imagine the chase when a thug steals a scooter from the toy shop?


  2. All change

    January 3, 2012 by Amy Hansford

    You may notice that ye olde blog looks a little different. I thought it was time for a little update and change of colour, plus changing to a theme that gives me a little more breathing space on the blog side of the panel compared to the last one. You like?

    According to Google Analytics, someone came to my website last month using possibly the most amusing phrase ever as a search term. “how to touch a girls butt without her finding out while she is awaket”. Brilliant. Certainly tickled me. The answer is here for you kiddo: don’t. You’ll get the most amazing slap if you do.

    And finally, I did say that I would make a hat to go with the washing-up themed pantomime dame dress below. That I did. Using baubles hotglued to a base and kept on with elastic, it’s meant to look like washing up bubbles. Unfortunately, given the rigorous nature of the dance routine involved, the hat had to be retired to the dressing room. Mind you, it still looked bloody good up to that point!


  3. My Sunday

    September 26, 2010 by Amy Hansford


  4. Knock Knock

    May 5, 2010 by Amy Hansford

    I work in one of the oldest parts of the council buildings in Bedford. There are photos (and paintings) of old Mayors lining the corridor walls and you can?t step without hearing creaky floorboard. So you?ll understand why, when in an empty room, without hearing any movement outside of said room, when* I heard the knocking coming from the corner, I became a little skittish.

    Following the speed of the beat of Flowers In The Window by Travis (sorry, it?s the only thing I could liken to the metronome), I heard;
    ?knock?knock?knock? ?knock knock? ? ? ? knock? knock? knock?? Yes, the Morse code for SOS. Heard TWICE. Followed by sporadic knocks since. It?s been quiet for a few minutes now.

    If this message is posted successfully on the internet, you?ll know I survived.

    *Written at 2.45pm


  5. Wibble wobble

    May 4, 2010 by Amy Hansford

    Also; I love these poems.

    I don’t know what I have done to my legs. But I do know the result – searing achey pain through my thighs. I have only felt like this once before; after a punishing cardio gym session, pushing hard on my legs. And if I’d made the trouble to actually go to the gym I wouldn’t mind so much. It’s the fact that my body’s punishing me and I’ve not done anything out of the ordinary which is annoying me.
    The result? Wobbly knees and legs that buckle when going up or down stairs, pain in trying to get up/lower on to a seat, etc.

    The real kick in the teeth? I’m meant to be Captaining our team in the It’s A Knockout Challenge in Wardown Park, Luton this Saturday! How can I run up a foam covered inflatable slide if I’m having to hang on to something just to stand up?

    Grumble!


  6. There once was an ugly duckling

    May 2, 2010 by Amy Hansford

    "How the heck do I get down from this step?"

    One of the lovely things about walking along the river to get to work is seeing the baby ducks!


  7. Om nom nom

    April 30, 2010 by Amy Hansford

    "Ew, gross!!!"


  8. April 18, 2010 by Amy Hansford

    Om nom... eh?

    I try and prepare myself some lunch. I do. Sometimes I get more creative than just a sandwich and I prepare a salad. I say prepare; pour the contents of a salad bag into tuppaware, put some bacon bits into a pot and pack the salad dressing.

    So here’s my well prepared lunch. Notice anything?
    Can you imagine how annoyed I was when I realised that was my only option?


  9. Bed head

    March 25, 2010 by Amy Hansford

    Rise and shhhzzzzzzzzz....

    After I have my cuddle from Alex in the morning, I get a wake up call/slump/poke/cuddle from Max. Welcome to my morning.


  10. The earth says hello!

    March 21, 2010 by Amy Hansford

    Diddy daffodils

    It feels a little bit like Spring is actually here today. It’s odd – there’s a smell in the air of things growing.

    To celebrate this, some teeny tiny daffodils have sprouted up in the window box outside the kitchen. They have a certain ‘Alice in Wonderland angst’ about them. I expect them to sniff me as I go past in the morning…